Sex on the First Date

Don’t do it!

I didn’t mean to come across so conclusive but yeah don’t have sex on the first date. My religious beliefs aside, sex is a complicated ritual. It is too intricate to be done with just anyone. I am a firm believer in soul ties. That when people intercourse their souls intertwine. You cannot consent to intertwine with a person you barely even know.

Spiritual paranoia aside, there are psychological considerations as well. Do you think he will believe that you don’t usually have sex on the first date and that he is the exception? Men think they are hot, but not that hot. Say the relationship develops into something more and your foundation was lust and fornication. How will you be able to redirect it into something deep and meaningful?

Now to the technical issues, having sex with a person requires extensive background research. There was a girl who came to my neighbourhood once. She was driving around with her friends looking for something. Turns out she was looking for her baby daddy ‘Tinashe’ who claimed to live in Waterford. I told her that there was only one Tinashe and he wasn’t the one she was describing. This girl was pregnant and her parents had told her to bring the father of the baby who clearly had lied about his true identity.

In this HIV prevalent era, can you really be throwing yourself around like confetti? I sure do hope not. What’s the rush? If he can’t wait one night he won’t stay your whole life anyway. Why not wait, get to know the person. Get married and then have sex on the first date as a married couple.

Ultimately, do what feels good for you. If it absolutely can’t wait, have at it. Sex means different things to different people and humans can be very creative with this stuff. What does sex mean to you? What are the objectives when you indulge in sex? What are your sexual triggers? Are you an addict? If you don’t have sex on the first date, will you die?

Written by Thembie Terry Zulu